Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

How Long We've Been Married

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Loss of control


So, I have a confession to make...as a former teacher and a fairly organized person, I like to be in control...I love making lists and doing things to make my family's life run more easily. I loved the nesting phase of my pregnancy b/c my house was so organized and clean. And then came baby, and the Lord decided to teach me a lesson of dependence. I am in control of nothing...my energy level, my baby's moods, my emotions, my body, my appetite; it is all out of my hands. I really thought that after two weeks, I would have gotten into the swing of things, but as we head into the fourth of week of life with baby I feel like I am slowly returning back to normal, and that normal is not the normal I knew before. I think like with many other things, I want to get this right the first time, and if I can't I get frustrated. The Lord continues to show that He is ultimately in control. So even if my sweet baby girl hasn't learned how to sleep through the night, my God is still all powerful and knows what I need before I ask. The lesson in faith continues day by day....everyday brings a chance to learn more reliance on the Lord instead of my own strength. More updates soon:)

Friday, July 1, 2011

A Baby Story

We have celebrated one week of time with Charlotte. She is so sweet and good most of the time; the only time she gets really fussy is when she is hungry...she takes after her mama in that way. It's been great to have Cole home this week and have together time, just the three of us.

I thought I would take the chance to tell you about our baby's arrival. Last week, I was involved in a elementary music workshop for four days. Even though I won't be teaching next year, I still have to keep up my professional development if I want to keep my license current. I wasn't going to do the workshop, but I had a very good friend who convinced me that it would be better for me to get more professional development hours instead of staying at home, waiting for Charlotte's arrival. So I went to the first two days of the workshop. The morning of the third day was going involve a lot of movement activities...nothing that hard core, but movement nonetheless. The workshop was at the U of A. I joked with some friends, one of whom was due a week before me, that all the movement would put us into labor that night. Well, I got my wish; while at lunch in the union, my water broke. I felt like I was in a sitcom. So few women actually have their water break at all let alone in a public place. Three of my music teacher friends sprung into action...two walked me to go get my stuff from the band building and the other went and got her car. I called Cole and had him meet us at the BCM on the U of A campus.

Cole and I then hightailed it to the clinic to make sure it was my water that broke, with a short stop at home to grab our hospital bags. When we got to the clinic, I was checked by the nurse practicioner, who said it was definately my water that broke and that I was dialated to a three...I had been a one on Monday. We were then taken downstairs where the hospital actually is....our hospital is a women's clinic and hospital in one. We were put in triage b/c the hospital was CRAZY busy. Not long after I got hooked up to the monitor I started having contractions. At first, I told the nurse that I wasn't sure about getting an epidural. I really wanted to experience natural labor if I could stand it, but an hour later I was singing a different tune. I told the nurse I wanted an epidural. Not long after that, I started getting sick, b/c I had just finished eating lunch before my water broke. It was miserable trying to relax your body for a contraction, but being in so much pain that you can't help but tense up b/c you're about to be sick to your stomach. The clinic was so packed that we didn't get into a room until 4...and by that point I was dialated to a 4.

Luckily, an hour later I got an epidural, about 5 o'clock. By this time I was dilated to a 5. After I got the epidural, they went ahead and put me on pictocin to help along my labor. Everything before the epidural is fuzzy, but after the epidural, life was good. I will definately do it again the next time we have a baby. The pain was just too much for my body to handle. My parents arrived shortly before the epidural (poor them) and Cole's parents arrived shortly after. After the epidural, we just relaxed until 7. The doctor came in and said i was at a 9...and we would start pushing in the next hour. We kicked everyone out of the room at about 7:30 so I could get some rest. That half hour was so precious for me and Cole. We went through some psalms and prayed together for the birth of our baby and for wisdom on how to be good parents. At 8:15 we started pushing and by 8:48 we had a baby!!!

We are so blessed by Charlotte already. You know when your mom tells you "you'll understand when you have your own children." She was so right! First of all, the gospel has become so much clearer. I wouldn't give my daughter as a sacrifice for anyone, so it is so much more powerful when I think about the sacrifice God made in giving his ONLY son. Charlotte depends on me and Cole for everything. Sometimes she doesn't like what we do, like changing her clothes or her diaper, but it's necessary for her to be healthy. So much of the time we time, I act like Charlotte. I cry and complain b/c I don't want to experience momentary discomfort. But God, in his sovreignty, knows what I need...more than I could ever know. What a lesson that I know I will keep learning through the years.